Today is a harder day than others. No particular reason. It just is. Some days it’s easy not to think about what’s going on or the process that’s looming over me or all the little factors that make up this process. Some days, it’s hard to think about anything else. You know, it's just that some days are better than others. I find the looking at infertility boards on pinterest helps. It helps me not to feel so alone in this whole thing. I know I have a very large circle of support - that's the luxury of working with fifteen of the best fertility nurse coordinators in the business - but sometimes, you just can't help but feel alone in this. Today when I was on pinterest, I saw a pin that completely, one thousand percent, sums up everything that I am feeling today.
I am not depressed, not by any stretch of the imagination. I just have bad days and today is one of those bad days with this whole process. I think any woman who goes through this feels the same way and constantly questions and wonders why and how. Brandon is very patient, but sometimes even he gets frustrated with this process. My bad days become his bad days. Regardless, he is so incredibly compassionate and he really helps me to get through the tougher days. I am very lucky to have a support system as wonderful as mine that makes this process manageable.
It’s funny how things work out – when I most needed my girlfriends, I got my wish. Tonight I got an email from one of my best friends from high school who will be in town in a few weeks. She wants to get together with some of our other best friends. The timing could not have been more perfect. I will get to have dinner with three of my favorite people at the start of the, what I hope will be the last, two-week wait... Well maybe not the last, but the last before the first little Wilkinson comes along.